Speed Dating

Can you really meet the man or women of your dreams after just a few minutes of casual chit-chat? That's the premise behind speed dating, a new mating sport that is being played in bars, clubs and community centers in North America and Europe.
The best way to describe speed dating is as a cross between a job interview, a blind date and a game of musical chairs. Participants get three to eight minutes, depending on where you are playing the game, to meet scores of different potential partners. With speed dating you can meet as many as twenty-five people (maybe more, depending on the length of the game) in one fell swoop.

Some see speed dating as being the ideal hybrid between online and offline dating. You get to meet a number of strangers within the safety of a friendly and merry environment that is policed by the organizers. At the end of the night you can ask a partner for a date, but a date only takes place if the other party is in agreement. In most speed dating games, most communication is written or concealed from the potential dates. A big plus is that it spares singles the face-to-face embarrassment of turning someone down.

You are advised to turn down speed dating events that are too publicly advertised or take place in a bar that is known for its wild antics. Often, with this type of heavily promoted speed dating venture, you run the risk of having an audience gawk at you while you meet potential partners. Always check out the venue before you attend an event to make sure that you are not part of a public spectacle. Speed dating that is held at a church or community venue is probably your safest bet when it comes to privacy, tact and anonymity.

Speed dating probably best suits busy careerists who would benefit from meeting as many people as they can within a short period of time. This includes busy individuals such as lawyers or performers who have had no time for pursuing romance simply because they have spent a decade or so focusing on education and then launching a business. Speed dating also suits health professionals and individuals who work off-hours, such as waitresses, shift-workers, and health professionals. Speed dating is ideal for those who always find themselves working the traditional date nights such as Friday and Saturday night.

Speed dating also benefits those who are looking for a more serious relationship, as it is understood that these functions are for individuals who are looking for a long-term connection. If you are sick of the immaturity or addictions that come hand-in-hand with people you meet in bars and clubs then this might be a more efficient way to meet someone who is not intent on wasting your time with their emotional problems.

Having sex in an unusual place

Ever joined the Mile High Club, had sex in the sea, copulated in the cinema, experienced love in a lift, got all amorous alfresco or even done it on your desk at work?

Having sex in an unusual place is one of the most common naughty fantasies: maybe it's exhibitionism, the risk/danger factor or just the excitement of taking sex out of its usual context and doing it in a different place. And many of you saucy soFeminine readers have had at least one experience of sex in an, ahem, original place...

9 of our readers confess where they've had sex in a public or 'original' place, how they went about it and the precautions they took (aside from the obvious!).

Have you ever done it in a public place? Would you dare? Tell us what you think by taking part in our survey.

What Is Sex?

What is sex may seem like a silly question for an adult to ask, but after speaking and corresponding with thousands of people over the years I’ve come to believe that many of our problems about sex are actually problems of definition. As such every search for information, tips and techniques, or answers to sexual problems can benefit from taking a moment to make sure we know what we’re talking about when we talk about sex.

Definitions of Sex

Anna Freud famously wrote that “sex is something you do, sexuality is something you are.” This way of understanding sex highlights the difference between the act of sex and the individual experience of sexuality, which is an intrinsic part of who we are, one that can’t be separated out of ourselves any more than our ethnicity or religious/spiritual beliefs.
Dictionary definitions of sex tend to be less literary, offering several definitions including:

Sex is a way of distinguishing male and female members of a species, usually by referencing their reproductive functions.
Sex refers to coitus or intercourse, an act that can result in reproduction.
Sex refers to the genitals.
The answer you get to the question “what is sex” depends largely on who you ask. A doctor might tell you that sex is defined by hormones in your body; a therapist might say that sex is all in your head; a guru may tell you that sex is about getting closer to God. Given such broad definitions, it can be helpful to narrow your focus and figure out what aspect of sex you want to learn more about.